Rich's Memorial

It’s taken me a while to gain enough perspective and distance on this to be able to write about it – at least with some semblance of coherence. I’m still struggling with where to start.

Rich was my cousin and an awesome guy.



I’m not going to go into too much detail about his life. If you’d like details you could go here. What I want to talk about was what he meant to me. His father passed away when he was a boy and he kinda glommed onto my dad as a mentor figure. So, out of all of my relatives, Rich was the one most like my dad.

He loved nature and camping. He was so artistic and creative. He believed in random acts of kindness so much that he couldn’t seem to stop himself. He loved his family. He built his own home. He had the most amazingly lame sense of humor too. He was very much like my father and even a lot like me. But I never really felt like I knew him.

Pics from our last Idaho trip:


There was a whole person there that I never really got to know. The parts of himself that he chose to share with the world, including his children, were all wonderful things that I liked and loved. But I still felt like there was a secret person there that I couldn’t see or touch. I missed the opportunity to get to know that secret person inside, and I know it. And I regret it.

About this time last year, Rich was diagnosed with cancer. Pancreatic cancer. It was in its final stages when it was discovered. Last November, we went to Idaho to visit Rich and his family. You may remember that post, and the wonderful fall we had. Rich was still well enough to take us fishing, drive us around the entire valley and show us all of the local sites. He also bagged himself the biggest elk he had ever gotten. He was glowing, and joking around, messing around with Abby, holding a fish for her to touch (her first fish), and it was awesome. I’m so grateful we got to spend that time with him.

I’m so grateful Lee got to see him in his element. I’m so grateful he got to meet Abby. My dad never did.

Mike, mom and I went back to Idaho for his service. It was inspiring to see how many people turned out to honor Rich that day. Troops of Boy Scouts were there, all in uniform. Idaho State Police were there, all in uniform. The Border Patrol was there, all in uniform. Even a couple Canadian Mounties were there, all in uniform. More than 300 people attended his memorial. They ranged from people who had worked side by side with him to people who had seen some of his hand crafted wood works.



After dad’s service, Rich and his brother, Wayne, did the most thoughtful thing for me and my brother. They took us out to Starbucks and made us laugh. They had us giggling in the car ride there and back. It was the best thing for us. After Rich’s service, Mike and I tried to do the same thing for his kids. We took a drive around the refuge, and Mike and I had them laughing in no time. I hope in some small way, we repaid Rich’s kindness to us.

I’m so grateful I was lucky enough to have Rich in my life.